The Denver Broncos have at long last dumped their prima donna QB on the Chicago Bears in exchanged for QB Kyle Orton and three draft picks. The Broncos will receive the 18th overall pick and a third round selection in this year’s draft, a first round pick in next year’s draft and the peace of mind in knowing the level of estrogen in the locker room will return to null.

“What a diva wants, a diva gets,” said Cutler following the trade. “If I wanted to stay here, I would still be a Bronco…but the diva did not want. No, no…the diva did not want.”

The deal was the result of months of a back and forth “she said, she said” between new Broncos coach Josh McDaniels and the diva. McDaniels inquired about a possible trade for then Patriots QB Matt Cassel and once word got back to the diva, he “wasn’t havin’ none of that” so he put his heels down and demanded a trade.

The Redskins were among the teams rumored to be interested in dealing for the disgruntled QB, but couldn’t match the arsenal of picks and show-stopping talent of Kyle Orton to get a deal done. Jason Campbell would have been the centerpiece of any deal between Denver and Washington.

“Yeah, I heard all the stuff about the front office trying to get Cutler and they even told me ‘yo, Jason…if we get the chance to get Cutler, we’re probably going to trade you since he’s kinda better than you’,” said Campbell. “I was like, ‘cool man, handle your business’…and that was the end of it.”