New Hamels just old Hamels with fake mustache
The critically-acclaimed 2010 version of Cole Hamels made his regular season debut on Wednesday against the Nationals, which just turned out to be a mustachioed version of 2009 Cole Hamels.
“If he didn’t have that thing on, I’d say he didn’t change a thing from last year,” said Phillies pitching coach Rich Dubee of Hamels and his fake mustache. “Hopefully he takes that [expletive] off and uses the new pitches we worked on the next time he goes out there.”
Hamels picked up the win despite throwing 103 pitches in just five innings of work, giving up two unearned runs on five hits and four walks.
The Phillies will look for the series sweep against the Nationals tonight as Kyle Kendrick debuts his new “keep-it-in-the-ballpark” pitch and Iguodala glasses.
Manuel reports no pain after watching Lidge throw off mound
Charlie Manuel told reporters that he felt no pain while watching Brad Lidge throw 30 pitches off of a mound on Thursday.
“I really felt good out there today,” Manuel said of his Lidge-watching session. “A lot of people didn’t know this, but I watched in a good deal of pain for most of 2009 when Brad was on the mound. It’s one of those things you just have to fight through and keep watching though. Today’s outing was a good sign that I may be able to stay pain-free all year.”
Manuel also suffered through bouts of Jimmy and Cole last season in addition to the painful Lidge outings, but according to team doctors, being able to watch Roy Halladay every fifth day should help the manager stay healthy and pain-free.
Would Halladay and Lee be in the same rotation if Jamie Moyer retired?
December 16, 2009 by Zaki
Filed under Analysis & Opinions
I think everyone with at least one finger on the Phillies’ bandwagon would say ‘yes’, Cliff Lee would probably be our number two starter right now if Jamie Moyer retired either during or after last season.
I’m not necessarily saying that Moyer is the sole reason why the Phils will not march into the World Series with a stacked lineup and rotation this season, but he’s certainly not helping the situation. The Phillies owe Moyer around $8 million for 2010 to compete to be our fifth and final starter in the rotation behind Halladay, Cole Hamels, Joe Blanton and J.A. Happ. And by ‘compete’, I mean that he may not even get the job and we could have an $8 million long reliever on our hands.
Moyer balked when he was pulled from the rotation late last season, even when it was the best move for the team. Now it’s looking like Moyer is interfering with the team’s improvement again, but this time it’s without even throwing a pitch.
I’ve got nothing against Moyer and he was as much a part of 2008 as anyone else, but when I think about how we could have had Cliff Lee — for at least 2010 — over a 47-year-old pitcher who was bumped out of the rotation last season and is coming off of several surgeries, I think that’s a no-brainer.
I don’t think any of us would have passed on signing a 2-year $13 million deal like Moyer did, so I blame the Phillies for giving a 45-year-old that much money for two years, but at the very least step up and say you’d defer some of your money to next year so we can afford to keep Lee on the team.
Of course, the deferring money thing applies to everyone else on the team as well, like so many others have said. Are we to understand that there was no possible way to keep Lee here at all? I call shenanigans on you, Ruben…and whoever else was involved in this whole process.
As always, I’ll reserve my more viscous judgment until later on, but if Moyer tanks again or we make it to the World Series and Halladay’s the only pitcher pulling his weight, we’ll look back on this trade and know that this is where we went wrong.
Hamels, Howard taking devastating World Series loss in stride
The Phillies lost their bid to become the first back-to-back World Series champions since the 1976 Cincinnati Reds as the Yankees took home their 27th championship in team history. Many members of the Phils could barely pull themselves off the dugout floor after taking a roundhouse kick to the junk, but Cole Hamels and Ryan Howard managed to hold their heads high in defeat.
“Oh my gosh, it’s finally over!” exclaimed Hamels, somehow in the middle of the Yankees clubhouse celebration. “It’s something I honestly thought would never happen but here we are and it’s just unreal. Such an incredible feeling. I’m glowing…do you see this? I’m actually glowing right now.”
Howard set a World Series record by striking out 13 times in the six-game series, but was relatively upbeat after Wednesday’s loss.
“I’m not gonna lie, it does hurt a little,” Howard said after spraying the Bronx crowd with two bottles of champagne. “But I don’t think anyone should be disappointed with the way things turned out. People are probably gonna say that we could have easily beat the Yanks and you know what? They’re probably right. But DJ Hero is finally out for my Xbox and I’ve only got about 96 days to get rollin’ on that, so…umm…love, peace and chicken grease, I’m out.”
Manuel: I trust my bullpen, just not around my wife or a baseball
Charlie Manuel answered questions on Friday about his decision to go with potential Game 3 starters Joe Blanton and J.A. Happ out of the bullpen after Cole Hamels — who apparently couldn’t wait until February to knock his wife up — left after five innings in the 5-4 loss to the Rockies.
Some have said Manuel brought in his starters because he no longer trusts anyone out of the bullpen.
“Everybody says I don’t trust my bullpen and that’s just not true,” Manuel said. “Just because I don’t want them anywhere near my wife or to pitch in a game ever again doesn’t mean I don’t trust them with other things…like driving to the ballpark and dressing themselves.”
Though Blanton and Happ’s use in Game 2 doesn’t prevent either from starting Game 4, it does mean that Pedro Martinez will start for the Phillies on Saturday for Game 3. It also means that Kyle Kendrick and/or Brad Lidge’s spot on the playoff roster could have been filled by John Mayberry Jr., who could have pinch run on Thursday instead of risking Cliff Lee with the game on the line.
Manuel also suffered a mild stroke in the seventh inning when he was forced to bring in Scott Eyre to replace Happ, who took a line drive off of the leg and had to leave the game.
“It’s not that I won’t use the guys from the ‘pen,” Manuel explained on Friday. “They’re just last on my list after I’ve used the starters and asked all 46,000 or so fans if they want to take a crack at it first.”
Lee unavailable for Game 2 after clutch nine-inning save
It appears the question of who the Phillies’ playoff closer will be was answered yesterday as Charlie Manuel called upon Cliff Lee in the first inning to close out Game 1 against the Rockies.
Manuel’s hunch paid off as Lee dominated for nine innings in relief, giving up only one run in the final frame as he closed the door for the Phillies in a 5-1 victory.
“Cole [Hamels] was ready to start the game,” Lee said after the game. “But with the score knotted at zero in the top of the first, I guess Charlie didn’t want to take any chances.”
Lee will not be available to pitch in Thursday’s Game 2 matchup and will likely sit out Game 3 as well, due to being overextended on Wednesday. This means Manuel will have a tough decision to make should Hamels throw an incomplete game on Thursday.
“If Cole can go out there and give me nine innings, that would make my job a lot easier,” Manuel said. “If we have to dip into the bullpen, I’m just gonna go with what the gut tells me. Right now it’s tellin’ me Cole should just go ahead and throw nine innings.”
Back from completely-abled list, Hamels shuts down Giants
Cole Hamels returned to the mound after a five-month hiatus to allow only two hits in a complete game shutout against the Giants.
Hamels, who also struck out nine in the win, spent the past five months on the completely-abled list with undisclosed wellness.
“There wasn’t anything wrong with the guy,” said Charlie Manuel. “He was healthy and fully able to pitch but almost felt a little too good after we won the World Series. We had no choice but to CL him.”
The Phils will look for more of the same success from the lefthander as he works his way back after the long layoff.
Hamels 'upset' with Pedro's soulful banquet-circuit debut
Pedro Martinez followed up his highly-anticipated Phillies debut on Wednesday with a controversial, yet silky-smooth move that has Cole Hamels up in arms.
Martinez, who won his first major league start in over 10 months, got an early jump on his endorsement and signed on to become the new spokesman for Soul Glo. The pairing of Martinez with Jheri curl activator may be the most natural sponsorship match since Fred and Barney peddled Winston cigarettes on the Flintstones.
The deal isn’t sitting well with Hamels, who is considered the banquet-circuit ace in the Phils clubhouse.
“It’s one thing for him to come in here and outpitch me and knock me down in the rotation, but no one’s gonna get more face time than me…no one,” said an irate Hamels as he attempted to throw a chair across the room, but it ricochetted off of the wall past him for a solid single. “Pedro doesn’t know what he’s up against.”
Philly hit with over three inches of Halladay-generated drool
The mere thought of adding Roy Halladay to the defending World Champions’ roster has left some Philadelphians waist-deep in their own slobber and without power last night.
The situation in the Delaware Valley may get worse before it gets any better as more and more fans realize just how freaking incredible the Phillies would be with Roy Hall-of-Fame-some-a-day atop their rotation.
“I was out at P.J. Welihan’s with my boys talking about the whole Halladay situation,” said Ryan Billings, a South Jersey Phillies fan. “The next thing we know, everybody in the bar is talking about it and we’re all wallowing in our own saliva. Sounds really gross, but we didn’t really care. We just want Halladay.”
Halladay would give Phils fans the opportunity to look back 10 years from now and say they witnessed not only the greatest team in franchise history, but possibly one of the greatest in major league history.
By 2019, Chase Utley will have officially become the greatest second baseman to play the game. Ryan Howard will be the most prolific home run hitter since Babe Ruth. Jimmy Rollins will have punched his ticket to Cooperstown with his 3,000th career hit. The rotation of Roy Halladay, Cole Hamels, Joe Blanton, Jamie Moyer and Pedro Martinez may end up with the largest career win totals of any rotation ever. Jayson Werth will have his own statue in front of The Bank, capturing his signature strikeout, fall-on-one-knee swing and best of all, the Phils will have won back-to-back World Series and quite possibly an unprecedented twelve-peat.
EDITOR’S NOTE TO PHILLIES FRONT OFFICE: Stop farting around and get this done.
Phillies players want to know if you’re entertained yet
The once mighty Phillies had lost their way after being sold into slavery by Subway, Dick’s Sporting Goods, New Era and ESPN the Magazine.
Now forced to battle for the freedom they once took for granted, the defending WFCs arrived back at the legendary Citizens Bank Coliseum to dismantle a barbarian hoard of Metropolitans in three straight matches and slaughtered an unarmed gang of Redstockings 22-1 in an effort to re-establish their major league dominance.
“My name is Cole Hamels, soon-to-be father to an African baby, husband to a hot wife and we will win another WFC, in this season or the next,” said Hamels after the victory. “But hopefully this season.”