Jamie Moyer was visibly ornery against the Cubs on Tuesday as he had lost both his reading glasses and his spot in the rotation in a span of five minutes.

“I know these things don’t just sprout legs and walk away,” Moyer repeated several times as he tore through the Phillies’ visiting clubhouse. “They have to be around here somwhere.”

Scott Eyre eventually gestured to Moyer that his glasses had been on his head the entire time but had no such answer for his lost rotation spot.

“I’ve had that thing for over 16 years now,” said Moyer of his valued spot. “The real kicker is that I honestly have no clue how or when I lost it either. I just hope no one stole it.”

Pedro Martinez was reportedly seen strutting around the field on Wednesday with a spot that looked very similar to the one once ownd by Moyer.

“I didn’t steal anything from anybody,” said Martinez. “I got this spot from Ruben [Amaro], so you’ll have to ask him where he got it.”