Pirates pitcher Ross Ohlendorf hadn’t won a game since August 18 of last season and hadn’t had arms in ever, but managed to hold the Phillies to five hits in seven shutout innings with eight strikeouts.

Ohlendorf had previously struggled with his lack of discernible talent or ability to grip and throw a baseball, but somehow excelled against the reigning National League champions, picking up his first win in nearly a full calendar year.

“We’ve been struggling for a while now, but I think this is a new low,” Jayson Werth said after the game. “It’s bad enough that the guy plays for the Pirates and has never held or thrown a baseball before, but to lose to a guy that hasn’t won a game since last August is kind of ridiculous.”

The Phillies lost to the Pirates the previous night when Daniel McCutchen, who carried an 0-3 record and an 11.00 ERA into the game and was born without a torso or bones, held the Phillies to one earned run over 5.1 innings.