New York Mets looking for roommate to help out with bills

New York Mets announced Thursday that the team is currently looking for a roommate to try and offset some operating expenses and asked that you contact them if you know anybody.

“We’ll give you complete run of the place if you can just pitch in to cover some of Angel Pagan’s salary or at least the sewer bill,” said team owner Fred Wilpon, who now lives in his office but promises that you wouldn’t even know he was there. “Really though, whatever you can contribute is cool.”

In an effort to draw more interest, the Mets have offered to let you manage a few games if you commit to a two-year lease and try to keep it down after 11pm.