Romo asks to take over janitor duties for Cowboys
Updated: December 11, 2009

By , Contributor to

In an act of uncanny selflessness, Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo has volunteered his services this week to clean the team’s bathroom facilities.

Team officials have yet to commit to a janitor for this weekend, but have spent the practice week working out potential candidates. Current bathroom conditions have been linked to the struggles of kicker, Nick Folk.

“I am having a difficult time getting into a rhythm while I am on the can,” said an obviously frustrated Folk. “By the time I realize there is no TP, it’s too late. I haven’t had a clean transition in ages.”

Astute observers will recall Romo’s last experience in this capacity in the 2007 NFC Divisional playoff game. With a nearly spotless record, Romo unexpectedly left a massive turd in the middle of the playing surface. His unsuccessful scoop and score attempt to conceal it effectively ended Dallas’ playoff run. Despite recurring nightmares, Romo appears ready to put that turd behind him.

“When you’re the quarterback of a football team, really all that matters is hygiene,” Romo said Thursday. “If this helps us with that, I’m going to do it”


3 Responses to “Romo asks to take over janitor duties for Cowboys”

  1. Mat McBriar on December 11th, 2009 8:17 pm

    He can have the job. Wait till he sees Jason Witten’s stall when he is through.

  2. Crash on December 11th, 2009 8:55 pm

    That’s my custodian [sniff, snif]

  3. Zaki on December 11th, 2009 8:59 pm

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