Phillies fans cheer the death of elderly man
Updated: May 2, 2011

By ,

Phillies FansIn what may be the most heinous act in the long, sad history of disturbing behavior by Philly fans, the death of an elderly man was cheered loudly by thousands of fans during a Phillies game against the Mets on Sunday.

Osama Bin Laden, a 54-year-old Saudi man who was the mastermind behind the September 11, 2001 attacks on the United States, was shot and killed Sunday which set off a chorus of cheers and chants of “USA! USA!” from the callous and barbaric Philadelphia crowd.

“It was possibly the worst thing I had ever seen in my life,” said ESPN analyst Buster Olney. “It’s that typical Philly fan behavior and it’s disgusting. You give them the chance to act like normal human beings after hearing that a guy was shot and killed, but they start cheering like animals. Braves and Giants fans would have sat quietly in their seats and said a prayer for this man’s family, but not in Philly. And by the way, if I haven’t mentioned him yet…Santa Claus.”

Following the game, one Phillies fan, Rob Bailey, took it upon himself to apologize on behalf of the entire fanbase for what took place Sunday night.

“It was pathetic. We should’ve cheered a lot louder than that,” said Bailey.

Zaki is the Chief Rocka and senior writer for and thinks you should hurry up and follow the site on Twitter and Facebook before it's too late.

38 Responses to “Phillies fans cheer the death of elderly man”

  1. Blaine on May 2nd, 2011 10:57 am

    How dare Americans celebrate the capture and death of a man who has terrorized thousands and thousands. How dare we cheer we cheer that a man responsible for the most devastating attack on American soil, will no longer be able to give another order to spill innocent blood. The only thing I find disgusting, is your willingness to publicly turn your back on a country that allows you to even write such an absurd article such as this. Philly fans may have a bad wrap, but I for one, as a Veteran to the war on terrorism applaud Philly and their love and support of this wonderful country you’re so quick to call barbaric. The firefighters and police and family of the fallen gathered at Ground Zero and celebrated the news…do you call them out as well? Find some new fans to pick on. Oh and by the way, I’m a Yankees fan. Just a little food for thought on how ignorant and ridiculous your article is.

  2. Zaki on May 2nd, 2011 11:20 am

    Blaine, thanks for the comment and a sincere thanks for your service to our country.


    This is a Philly sports satire site. I’m with you 100%…this is just my tongue-in-cheek way of saying it.

  3. Blaine on May 2nd, 2011 11:24 am

    This article isn’t “mildly entertaining” as much as distasteful and moronic.

  4. Blaine on May 2nd, 2011 11:28 am

    I don’t mean to be offensive, but there are plenty if nay sayers it there and I assumed you were one of them. The phrase “too soon” may be applicable here lol.

  5. RFS on May 2nd, 2011 12:08 pm

    I don’t even know how to reply to you Blaine other than Soap Box Fail.

  6. Zaki on May 2nd, 2011 12:15 pm


  7. alicia on May 2nd, 2011 12:22 pm

    Baseball fans have nothing to do with Americans being glad that the “elderly” mass murderer is no longer able to kill another human. As an AMERICAN and a Mother, I’m glad the elderly mass murderer is no longer even on the same planet as my children.

    I find it disgusting that you are using the death of the mastermind behind over 3000 innoncent American lives to get a jab in at a rival baseball team. Just be glad the soliders who DIED gave you the freedom to make yourself sound like a moron.

  8. Zaki on May 2nd, 2011 12:59 pm

    Awesome (x2)

  9. ryan on May 2nd, 2011 1:15 pm

    why is it everytime something happans in philly sports they bring up santa claus sports reporters need to find another city to pick on this is bull their was mets fans chanting to but they don’t count

  10. dudemanbrah on May 2nd, 2011 1:33 pm

    somebody get these people a clue

  11. robguz on May 2nd, 2011 1:50 pm

    Keep up the good work Zaki - maybe you should put ‘THIS IS A SATIRE’ in the title, but then again, some of these comments are just as hilarious as your piece, so maybe not.

  12. Dean on May 2nd, 2011 1:54 pm

    Are you people really that dense? Have you never seen someone be sarcastic before? Have you never read satire? After you finished reading the post did you hear a big whooshing sound buzz over your head?

  13. Commish on May 2nd, 2011 2:25 pm

    The saddest statement of the whole affair of yesterday is that for a long while Osama took more hits in the head than the Fightin’s had on the field. What has the world come to? Baseball world that is.

  14. jay on May 2nd, 2011 2:35 pm

    Bin Ladin is dead!!? After seeing the headline, I thought you were talking about Raul Ibanez.

  15. biteyertongue on May 2nd, 2011 2:46 pm

    “Onionesque” comes to mind. Maybe they need to visit The Onion to get Onionated before proceeding. The web is a sarcastic place, beware the literal minded. If Rick Reilly or whatshisname Cowherd had written this, that would be one thing…

  16. Zaki on May 2nd, 2011 2:57 pm

    Haha, you guys are great

  17. Jaekwon on May 2nd, 2011 2:58 pm

    It’s satire, guys. Chill. It’s a joke.

  18. Keith on May 2nd, 2011 3:36 pm

    Both this article and the commentary following it are full of win. Keep up the great work Zaki!

    By the way, if wish to deter morons from commenting on your site, perhaps you should not use such large words like “satire” or “fictional” to describe your website. Not everyone graduated from Harvard Law Zaki…

  19. Zaki on May 2nd, 2011 4:06 pm

    Thanks Keith…I probably shouldn’t use words at all…just big, colorful pictures.

  20. Natalie on May 2nd, 2011 5:41 pm

    In true Philadelphian fashion I am taking this opportunity to tell Buster Olney to go f*ck himself. The Braves and Giants fans would have been silent because they would have left the stadium already.

  21. Brad on May 2nd, 2011 5:57 pm

    I reposted one of your article “World Series not that cool anymore thanks to Giants” on my facebook page. The girl I was hooking up with at the time responded saying how disgusted she was with how the players were acting and how interest in baseball was falling. Needless to say I began to question my true motivation in spending time with her.

    Keep up the good work. If you’re not pissing off stupid people you’re not doing your job right.

  22. Zaki on May 2nd, 2011 6:03 pm

    Haha, well said Brad! Thanks!

  23. rory on May 2nd, 2011 6:14 pm

    How are people this stupid? Even after MULTIPLE people pointed out that this is satire they’re still on the defensive. Are you seriously that stupid Natalie that you believe buster Olney said that? Before any other person comments, this article is sarcastic, not serious. Relax people and enjoy that they’re basically mocking the national media. Lighten up already. Wow.

  24. BA on May 2nd, 2011 7:40 pm

    It surprises me daily how stupid people are and can still get along in life on a daily basis. *shaking head*

  25. bruce on May 2nd, 2011 8:14 pm

    Ya the guy was a great humanatarian and should get a Nobel prize for his efforts—-this article sucks???

  26. Lynniemac on May 2nd, 2011 9:52 pm

    Pointing out that the article is satire to the people who are offended is pretty pointless. I’ve noticed that when people who aren’t familiar with a website (particularly a humorous one) get offended by something on it, they don’t bother reading anyone else’s comments. They also don’t usually bother coming back.

    I LOL’d, but…I’d think “Olney” would’ve worked in a mention of how much better behaved the fans of St. Louis would have been. They ARE the best in baseball, after all (also satire).

  27. Johnny Hamer on May 2nd, 2011 11:12 pm

    Some people take things way too seriously.

  28. Zaki on May 2nd, 2011 11:27 pm

    You might be right Lynnie…saying “it’s satire” to these folks is like speaking Chinese to a toaster.

  29. Philly Philms on May 3rd, 2011 2:47 am

    Haha. Good shit. I don’t know what I liked more, the article or the comment by Blaine. I too served in the military. Marines in fact. And I assure you that is not an excuse for being naive. This is clearly satire I would think.. bravo.

  30. Zaki on May 3rd, 2011 8:57 am

    Thanks man! And good shit and bravo right back at you for your service!

  31. ian on May 3rd, 2011 12:23 pm

    Yea I am sure osama family had a moment of silence for the 9/11 families when they were killed

  32. Phillygirl on May 3rd, 2011 1:05 pm

    BRILLIANT and hysterical! How stupid are these people that are seriously commenting on this article as if it were an editorial in the New York Times. SATIRE. Look it up on wikipedia if you must. It is a humorous look at the way Philly fans have been trashed in the media with many things blown out of proportion. I feel ill even having to explain this to you because it takes the fun out of the joke.

  33. jimjam on May 4th, 2011 9:58 am

    I wasn’t familiar with the site so it took me a minute (or maybe a second) to realize it was satire. sounds like a legit site. Maybe you should look into purchasing,, or something along those lines :) .

  34. Zaki on May 4th, 2011 10:31 am

    An idiot-proof satire site wouldn’t be all that fun, though.

  35. TJ on May 4th, 2011 8:06 pm

    I am dying reading these comments. These people can’t be that stupid can they? At least some of them have to be faking it… I hope. I think we’ve found a foolproof way to find an idiot. Let them read your articles and see their reaction. Unbelievable.

  36. TJ on May 4th, 2011 8:09 pm

    Ps I hear Fox News is trying to run with this story.

  37. Bob Terwilliger on May 10th, 2011 11:34 am

    Seriously? Some of those comments; it’s people like you who give the idea to us around the world that yanks are fucking morons.

    I’ve never been to this site before, but how hard can it be to pick up from the 4th line on that it’s satire? (Sa-tyre)

  38. no one on May 13th, 2011 10:56 pm

    wow blaine, you’re an idiot