NFL turns abandoned stadiums into chain of Fuddruckers
Updated: March 15, 2011

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Moments after announcing that the players had been locked out of the league, the NFL moved forward with plans to convert each of the newly abandoned stadiums into a chain of Fuddruckers restaurants.

“The players may be locked out of the NFL right now, but the flavor is definitely locked in our delicious hamburgers!” commissioner Roger Goodell said during a Tuesday press conference. “Don’t labor another minute! Visit any of our 32 locations for family fun at a collective bargain! You definitely won’t leave the table disappointed!”

Goodell also announced that the Fuddruckers wait staff could face a potential lockout if the two sides cannot agree that 100% of everyone’s tips belong to the NFL.

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